Hu's on first

Date: Fri, 22 Nov 2002 18:24:42 -0400 (AST)
From: "David M. Wimberly" <ag487@chebucto.ns.ca>
To: Sustainable-Maritimes <sust-mar@chebucto.ns.ca>
Precedence: bulk
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No breaking local news in the queue today ... so, sust-mar takes a break
for some humour ... submitted by David Wimberly.
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Playwright Jim Sherman wrote this today after Hu Jintao was named
chief of the Communist Party in China.

HU'S ON FIRST

By James Sherman

(We take you now to the Oval Office.)

George: Condi! Nice to see you. What's happening?

Condi: Sir, I have the report here about the new leader of China.

George: Great. Lay it on me.

Condi: Hu is the new leader of China.

George: That's what I want to know.

Condi: That's what I'm telling you.

George: That's what I'm asking you. Who is the new leader of China?

Condi: Yes.

George: I mean the fellow's name.

Condi: Hu.

George: The guy in China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The new leader of China.

Condi: Hu.

George: The Chinaman!

Condi: Hu is leading China.

George: Now whaddya' asking me for?

Condi: I'm telling you Hu is leading China.

George: Well, I'm asking you.. Who is leading China?

Condi: That's the man's name.

George: That's who's name?

Condi: Yes.

George: Will you or will you not tell me the name of the new leader
of China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir? Yassir Arafat is in China? I thought he was in the Middle
East.

Condi: That's correct.

George: Then who is in China?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir is in China?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Then who is?

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Yassir?

Condi: No, sir.

George: Look, Condi. I need to know the name of the new leader of China.
Get me the Secretary General of the U.N. on the phone.

Condi: Kofi?

George: No, thanks.

Condi: You want Kofi?

George: No.

Condi: You don't want Kofi.

George: No. But now that you mention it, I could use a glass of milk.
And then get me the U.N.

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: Not Yassir! The guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi?

George: Milk! Will you please make the call?

Condi: And call who?

George: Who is the guy at the U.N?

Condi: Hu is the guy in China.

George: Will you stay out of China?!

Condi: Yes, sir.

George: And stay out of the Middle East! Just get me the guy at the U.N.

Condi: Kofi.

George: All right! With cream and two sugars. Now get on the phone.

(Condi picks up the phone.)

Condi: Rice, here.

George: Rice? Good idea. And a couple of egg rolls, too. Maybe we should
send some to the guy in China. And the Middle East. Can you get Chinese
food in the Middle East?~



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SUST-MAR TIP: subscription management commands go to majordomo@chebucto.ca

CBC enviro news-briefs follow:
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CAPE BRETON LOSING PEOPLE, JOBS: ECONOMIST
The numbers in Cape Breton show more people are working right now. But an
economist says they don't explain what's really going happening on the
island.
FULL STORY
http://novascotia.cbc.ca/template/servlet/View?filename=ns_cpjobs20021216

SINGLE MOMS STRUGGLING TO FEED KIDS: REPORT
 Single mothers are going hungry in order to put food in their kids'
bellies, according to a new survey. And a Nova Scotia government policy is
being blamed for the hunger pangs.
FULL STORY
http://novascotia.cbc.ca/template/servlet/View?filename=ns_moms20021213

© Canadian Broadcasting Corporation


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